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It's that time of year to take our annual

senior citizen test.

Exercise of the brain is as important as

exercise of the muscles. As we grow older, it's important to keep

mentally alert. If you don't use it, you lose it! Below is a very

private way to gauge your loss or non-loss of intelligence.

Take the test presented here to determine

if you're losing it or not. The spaces below are so you don't see

the answers until you've made your answer.

OK, relax, clear your mind and begin.

1. What do you put in a toaster?

Answer: "bread." If you said "toast," give

up now and do something else.

Try not to hurt yourself. If you said

bread, go to Question 2.

2. Say "silk" five times. Now spell "silk."

What do cows drink?

Answer: Cows drink water. If you said

"milk," don't attempt the next question. Your brain is over-

stressed and may even overheat. Content yourself with reading a

more appropriate literature such as Auto World. However, if you

said "water", proceed to question 3.

3. If a red house is made from red bricks

and a blue house is made from blue bricks and a pink house is made

from pink bricks and a black house is made from black bricks, what

is a green house made from?

Answer: Greenhouses are made from glass. If

you said "green bricks," why are you still reading these???

If you said "glass," go on to Question 4.

4. It's twenty years ago, and a plane is

flying at 20,000 feet over Germany (If you will recall, Germany at

the time was politically divided into West Germany and East Germany

.) Anyway, during the flight, two engines fail. The pilot,

realizing that the last remaining engine is also failing, decides

on a crash landing procedure. Unfortunately the engine fails before

he can do so and the plane fatally crashes smack in the middle of

"no man's land" between East Germany and West Germany . Where would

you bury the survivors? East Germany , West Germany , or no man's

land"?

Answer: You don't bury survivors.

If you said ANYTHING else, you're a dunce

and you must stop. If you said, "You don't bury survivors", proceed

to the next question.

5. Without using a calculator - You are

driving a bus from London to Milford Haven in Wales . In London ,

17 people get on the bus. In Reading , six people get off the bus

and nine people get on. In Swindon, two people get off and four get

on. In Cardiff , 11 people get off and 16 people get on. In Swansea

, three people get off and five people get on. In Carmathen, six

people get off and three get on. You then arrive at Milford Haven.

What was the name of the bus driver?

Answer: Oh, for crying out loud!

Don't you remember your own name? It was

YOU!!

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