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I was in Wal-Mart buying a large bag of Purina for my Labrador

Retriever and was in line to check out.

A woman behind me asked if I had a dog.

On impulse, I told her that no, I was starting The Purina Diet again, although I probably shouldn't because I'd ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.

I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry & that the food is nutritionally complete so I was going to try it again.

I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was by now enthralled with my story, particularly a tall guy behind her.

Horrified, she asked if I'd been poisoned and was that why I was in the hospital.

I said no.....I'd been sitting in the street licking my balls and a car hit me.

I thought the tall guy was going to have to be carried out the door.

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Guest Fox300exchic

lol Thats great!! 24.gif

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    • By mywifeknowseverythin
      Yesterday I was buying a 2 large bags of Purina dog
      chow at Wal-Mart, for
      my dogs Winston, Chief, Gus, and Maximus. I was
      about to check out when a
      woman behind me asked if I had a dog.
      What did she think, that I had an elephant?
      Since I had little else to do, on impulse, I told
      her that no, I didn't have
      a dog, and that I was starting the Purina Diet
      again, although I probably
      shouldn't because I ended up in the hospital last
      time. On the bright side
      though, I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an
      intensive care ward with
      tubes coming out of every hole in my body and IVs
      in both arms.
      I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet
      and that the way that it
      works is to load your pockets with Purina nuggets
      and simply eat one or two
      every time you feel hungry and that the food is
      nutritionally complete so
      I was going to try it again. (I have to mention
      here that practically everyone in
      the line was enthralled with my story by now.)
      Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive
      care because the dog food
      had poisoned me. I told her no; I had stopped in
      the middle of the
      parking lot to lick my butt and a car hit me.
      I thought the guy behind her was going to have a
      heart attack, he was
      laughing so hard!
      WAL-MART won't let me shop there anymore.