mywifeknowseverythin

Stupid People

3 posts in this topic

How do these people survive?

ONE

Recently, when I went to McDonald's I saw on the menu that you could have an order of 6, 9 or 12 Chicken McNuggets. I asked for a half dozen nuggets. "We don't have half dozen nuggets," said the teenager at the counter. "You don't?" I replied. "We only have six, nine, or twelve,” as the reply. "So I can't order half dozen nuggets, but I can order six?" "That's right." So I shook my head and ordered six McNuggets

TWO

I was checking out at the local Wal-Mart with just a few items and the lady behind me put her things on the belt close to mine. I picked up one of those "dividers" that they keep by the cash register and placed it between our things so they wouldn't get mixed. After the girl had scanned all of my items, she picked up the "divider", looking it all over for the bar code so she could scan it. Not finding the bar code she said to me, "Do you know how much this is?" I said to her "I've changed my mind; I don't think I'll buy that today." She said

"OK” and I paid her for the things and left. She had no clue to what had just happened.

THREE

A lady at work was seen putting a credit card into her floppy drive and pulling it out very quickly. When I inquired as to what she was doing, she said she was shopping on the Internet and they kept asking for a credit card number, so she was using the ATM "thingy."

FOUR

I recently saw a distraught young lady weeping beside her car. "Do you need some help?" I asked. She replied, "I knew I should have replaced the battery to this remote door unlocker. Now I can't get into my car. Do you think they (pointing to a distant convenience store) would have a battery to fit this?" "Hmmm, I dunno. Do you have an alarm, too?" I asked. "No, just this remote thingy," she answered, handing it and the car keys to me. As I took the key and manually unlocked the door, I replied, "Why don't you drive over there and check about the batteries. It's a long walk."

FIVE

Several years ago, we had an Intern who was none too swift. One day she was typing and turned to a secretary and said, "I'm almost out of typing paper. What do I do?" "Just use copier machine paper," the secretary told her. With that, the intern took her last remaining blank piece of paper, put it on the photocopier and proceeded to make five "blank" copies.

SIX

I was in a car dealership a while ago, when a large motor home was towed into the garage. The front of the vehicle was in dire need of repair and the whole thing generally looked like an extra in "Twister." I asked the manager what had happened. He told me that the driver had set the "cruise control" and then went in the back to make a sandwich.

SEVEN

My neighbor works in the operations department in the central office of a large bank. Employees in the field call him when they have problems with their computers. One night he got a call from a woman in one of the branch banks who had this question: "I've got smoke coming from the back of my terminal. Do you guys have a fire downtown?"

EIGHT

Police in Radnor , Pa , interrogated a suspect by placing a metal colander on his head and connecting it with wires to a photocopy machine. The message "He's lying" was placed in the copier, and police pressed the copy button each time they thought the suspect wasn't telling the truth. Believing the "lie detector" was working, the suspect confessed.

NINE

A mother calls 911 very worried asking the dispatcher if she needs to take her kid to the emergency room, the kid was eating ants. The dispatcher tells her to give the kid some Benadryl and it should be fine, the mother says, I just gave him some ant killer..... Dispatcher: Rush him in to emergency room!

Life is tough. It's tougher if you're stupid

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
  •  Like what you are reading? Please help us by sharing this content.

lol... more good funnys from way back ...

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
  •  Like what you are reading? Please help us by sharing this content.

oh man some of them are really good.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
  •  Like what you are reading? Please help us by sharing this content.

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!


Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.


Sign In Now

  •  Like what you are reading? Please help us by sharing this content.
  • Similar Content

    • By KFx400jim
      I was looking through a bunch of pics on here. I noticed that people are doing crazy/stupid stuff with no gear on at all to protect themselves. I'm not a safety Nazi by any means but I do know that I have crashed enough times to know the value of the gear I wear. I'm also guilty of doing crazy/stupid things; the difference is that I have something on to protect me when I do.
      What are your thoughts?
    • By quadcrazy
      You may have noticed over the past couple of weeks that, we added referral link in your account pages, referral counts (along with friend counts in the forum), and a referral page. (Thank you Admin)
      This is in an effort to "Spread The Word" about QUADCRAZY.
      If you use the SPECIAL Referral link, a new member who signes up under you, will go towards a referral by you.
      It's easy, everyone has a referral link in the account page that looks like:

      http://www.quadcrazy.com/signup/friend_[b]MYUSERNAME[/b]/[code] You can use this link to give to your friends, (Just change the [b]MYUSERNAME[/b] to yours and test.) Here are some quick links you can use to add on MySpace, Friendster, Facebook, other websites, and use as your Forum Signature on other sites if they allow html. (Just change the [b]MYUSERNAME[/b] to yours and test.) [b]Come Join me at QUADCRAZY![/b] [code]<b><a href="http://www.quadcrazy.com/signup/friend_[b]MYUSERNAME[/b]/">Come Join Me at QUADCRAZY!</a></b>
      Have you checked out QUADCRAZY?

      <b><a href="http://www.quadcrazy.com/signup/friend_[b]MYUSERNAME[/b]/">Have you checked out QUADCRAZY?</a></b>
      Want to be on my QUADCRAZY friend's list?

      <b><a href="http://www.quadcrazy.com/signup/friend_[b]MYUSERNAME[/b]/">Want to be on my QUADCRAZY friend's list?</a></b>
      QUADCRAZY ATV Community - JOIN US!

      <b><a href="http://www.quadcrazy.com/signup/friend_[b]MYUSERNAME[/b]/">QUADCRAZY ATV Community - JOIN US!</a></b>
      To use in forum signatures that do not accept HTML, write whatever text you want and link it to your Referral link which is:

      http://www.quadcrazy.com/signup/friend_MYUSERNAME/">
      (Just change the MYUSERNAME to yours and test.)
      To use a banner with your referral link:
      (Just change the MYUSERNAME to yours and test.)


      <a href="http://www.quadcrazy.com/signup/friend_MYUSERNAME/"> <img border="0" src="http://quadcrazy.com/banner/234X60.gif" width="234" height="60">


      <a href="http://www.quadcrazy.com/signup/friend_MYUSERNAME/"> <img border="0" src="http://quadcrazy.com/banner/468X60.gif" width="468" height="60">
      Let's spread the word on the web!
    • By mywifeknowseverythin
      I was just made aware that I am your Greeting Party!!!! Had I known that(Im sure I should have known that:cute:) I would have Gave you a Warm and Friendly Welcome!!!!
      This post is to welcome all that have posted in here....I want you guys to feel at home here...This is a Great Site with a Great Group of People with lots of knowledge...We try to have fun, as this is what this sport is all about...
      If you have ANY QUESTIONS!!!! Please feel free to post them up or get a hold of me or ANY Moderator on this site and we will be happy to assist you in any way we can...
      As of right now your Moderating Team Is
      Mywifeknowseverything, NEWACRIDER, BuckBilly, and Ajmboy
      Thank you and have a Great time!!!!
      MWKE
    • By mywifeknowseverythin
      Arizona Laws
      When being attacked by a criminal or burglar, you may only protect yourself with the same weapon that the other person posseses.
      * Any misdemeanor committed while wearing a red mask is considered a felony. This goes back in the days of the Wild West
      Colorado laws
      * In Durango, it is illegal to go out in public dressed in clothing unbecoming" one's sex.
      * In Pueblo, Colorado it is illegal to let a dandelion grow within city limits.
      Kansas laws
      It is illegal for restaurants to sell cherry pie a la mode on Sundays.
      Kansa, Lang
      In Lang, it is illegal to ride a mule down Main Street in August, unless the animal is wearing a straw hat. Kansas Natoma,
      It is illegal to throw a knife at anyone wearing a striped shirt.
      Kansas, Wichita
      In Wichita, a man's mistreatment of his mother-in-law may not be used as grounds for divorce.
      In Wichita, it is illegal to carry a concealed bean snapper. Decidely a deadly weapon there....
      New York Law
      The penalty for jumping off a building is death.
      North Caroline laws
      It is against the law to roller blade on a state highway.
      If you are in possession of illegal substances you must pay taxes on them. However, paying taxes on these items does not make them legal.
      If a man and a woman who aren't married go to a hotel/motel and register themselves as married then, according to state law, they are legally married.
      Elephants may not be used to plow cotton fields.
      Fights between cats and dogs are prohibited.
      Ohio Laws
      It is illegal to fish for whales on Sunday.
      It is illegal for more than five women to live in a house.
      It is against the law to kill a housefly within 160 feet of a church without a license.
      It is illegal to get a fish drunk.
      Ohio, Bay Village
      It is illegal to walk a cow down Lake Road
    • By mywifeknowseverythin
      Working people frequently ask retired people what
      they do to make their days interesting.
      Well, for example, the other day Gladys and I went
      into town and went into a shop. We were only in there for about
      5 minutes. When we came out, there was a cop writing out a
      parking ticket. We went up to him and said, "Come on man, how about
      giving a senior citizen a break? " He ignored us and continued writing
      the ticket. I called him a Nazi turd. He glared at me and
      started writing another ticket for having worn tires.
      So Gladys called him a shithead. He finished the second ticket and put
      it on the windshield with the first. Then he started writing a third
      ticket. This went on for about 20 minutes. The more we abused him, the
      more tickets he wrote.
      Personally, we didn't care. We came into town by bus.
      We try to have a little fun each day now that we're retired. It's
      important at our age.