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By mywifeknowseverythin
Great sayings by police officers
These 16 Police Comments were taken off actual police car videos around the country:
#16 "You know, stop lights don't come any redder than the one you just went through."
#15 "Relax, the handcuffs are tight because they're new. They'll stretch after you wear them a while."
# 14 "If you take your hands off the car, I'll make your birth certificate a worthless document."
#13 "If you run, you'll only go to jail tired."
#12 "Can you run faster than 1200 feet per second? Because that's the speed of the bullet that'll be chasing you."
#11 "You don't know how fast you were going? I guess that means I can write anything I want to on the ticket, huh?"
#10 "Yes, sir, you can talk to the shift supervisor, but I don't think it will help.
Oh, did I mention that I'm the shift supervisor?"
#9 "Warning?” You want a warning? O.K., I'm warning you not to do that again, or I'll give you another ticket."
#8 "The answer to this last question will determine whether you are drunk or not. Was Mickey Mouse a cat or a dog?"
#7 "Fair? You want me to be fair? Listen, fair is a place where you go to ride on rides, eat cotton candy and corn dogs and step in monkey crap."
#6 "Yeah, we have a quota. Two more tickets and my wife gets a toaster oven."
#5 "In God we trust, all others we run through NCIC."
#4 "How big were those 'Just two beers' you say you had?"
#3 "No sir, we don't have quotas anymore. We use d to, but now we're allowed to write as many tickets as we can."
#2 "I'm glad to hear that Chief (of Police) Hawker is a personal friend of yours. So you know someone who can post your bail."
AND THE WINNER IS...
#1 "You didn't think we give pretty women tickets? You're right, we don't. Sign here."
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By George Henry
A clip from Diamonds Are Forever (1971) with James Bond riding a very early Honda Trike!
Three Honda ATCs come in at 1:54 with the one on th left pulling a sweet wheelie for 2 seconds!
Bond scenes are great!
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By Ajmboy
Many towns and government agencies have ATVs in their fleet. If you see some and take a picture, please post. I posted a couple in the gallery section of the Sheriff's Polaris ATVs. Pretty cool setup.
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By mywifeknowseverythin
Police Radar can be hazardous to the Police (UNCLASSIFIED)
Two California Highway Patrol Officers were conducting speeding enforcement
On I-15, just north of the Marine Corps Air Station at Miramar. One of the
Officers was using a hand held radar device to check speeding vehicles
Approaching the crest of a hill. The officers were suddenly surprised when
The radar gun began reading 300 miles per hour. The officer attempted to
Reset the radar gun, but it would not reset and then turned off. Just then a
Deafening roar over the treetops revealed that the radar had in fact locked
On to a USMC F/A-18 Hornet which was engaged in a low flying exercise near
The location.
Back at the CHP Headquarters the Patrol Captain fired off a complaint to the
USMC Base Commander. The reply came back in true USMC style: Thank you for
Your letter. We can now complete the file on this incident. You may be
Interested to know that the tactical computer in the Hornet had detected the
Presence of, and subsequently locked on to, your hostile radar equipment and
Automatically sent a jamming signal back to it, which is why it shut down.
Furthermore, an Air-to-Ground missile aboard the fully armed aircraft had
Also automatically locked on to your equipment location. Fortunately, the
Marine Pilot flying the Hornet recognized the situation for what it was,
Quickly responded to the missile system alert status and was able to
Override the automated defense system before the missile was launched to
Destroy the hostile radar position. The pilot also suggests you cover your
Mouths when cussing at them, since the video systems on these jets are very
High tech. Sergeant Johnson, the officer holding the radar gun, should get
His dentist to check his left rear molar . It appears the filling is loose.
Also, the snap is broken on his holster. Thank you for your concern. Semper
F I.
Classification: UNCLASSIFIED
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By Muskynut
I have about 500 acres behind my house that is state land and have been riding on the property for the last 18 years.
I know pretty much all the cops that patrol it and have always pulled over to talk with them. They have always been really nice guys. Well about 3 months ago while riding one the fire roads there was this new cop pulled over in a Jeep and I pulled up to him to talk and he jumped out with his hand on his gun and told me to get off my quad. After I got my helmet off and he saw I was in my 40's he just told me not to ride by the state run hospital and to be on my way.
Well yesterday I went for a quick ride and as I broke into this one field (nowhere near the hospital) I looked off to my left and saw this Police Jeep coming right at me at a high rate of speed, for a second I was going to just pull over to talk and I saw it was this same cop and there was no way he was going to be able to stop without hitting me so I hit the throttle and made this quick right and than a quick left onto another trail off this field. Well when I turned back to look he was bearing down on me trying to run me down. I than just hit the throttle hard blasted into a small swamp area and flew through the trails. I looked back and he never made it through the swamp.
I made it back home but I had to take a bunch of different trails to get there and I was on High Alert waiting for this nut case cop to come flying out and mow me down.
I called a cop friend of mine when I got home and he told me that this cop was kicked out of another police dept. because he's a few sandwiches short of a picnic and he is just finishing his time at the state run hopital until he retires.
I just hope he retires soon
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