mywifeknowseverythin

She never says no.....I ride where I feel Happy,,,,,Im Happiest in the Dunes of Oregon or Pismo....More so Oregon....Glamis is nice too.....Just too Far to drive.....I Grew up there though so I have had my Share...

:yes:Ummmm,,,,,wont find me in the Desert.....So Im safe

BTW,,,,,How long have you been a member of .org????? Just curious....If you dont recognize my name I was There and left WAY BEFORE your time...LMAO!!!

Not Arguing with you Brotha.....Just wanted to know what you meant by your other post....Mymint is a Very good Friend of mine....We have Twisted the Dunes Together and have modded a Website together...Just lookin out for him,,,thats all...

Ummm,,,,What do you know about him??? Is he a Good Guy or what??? Better know what you are talking about when you start talkin Smack....Isnt that the reason you are here??? All the Smack Talk???

Bad decisions make good stories.

Took me a Few tries but now Im smarter than a 2nd Grader!!!!! Frog Leap Test

I got a pre-declined credit card in the mail. I ordered a burger at McDonalds and the kid behind the counter asked, "Can you afford fries with that?" CEO's are now playing miniature golf. If the bank returns your check marked "Insufficient Funds," you call them and ask if they meant you or them. Hot Wheels and Matchbox stocks are trading higher than GM. McDonalds is selling the 1/4 ouncer. Parents in Beverly Hills fired their nannies and learned their children's names. A truckload of Americans was caught sneaking into Mexico . Dick Cheney took his stockbroker hunting. Motel Six won't leave the light on anymore. The Mafia is laying off judges. Exxon-Mobil laid off 25 Congressmen. Congress says they are looking into this Bernard Madoff scandal. Oh Great!! The guy who made $50 Billion disappear is being investigated by the people who made $1.5 Trillion disappear

Congrats.....!!!!!!!!!!! Damn Old Dirty Gas Eater Dead Or Dying Garbage Emitter Department of Defense Gravity Experime… Drips Oil Drops Grease Everywhere Dead On Day Guarantee Expires Dem Old Dudes Go Everywhere Driven Only During Grey Evenings Dangerous On Days Gears Engage Dead Old Dog Going East Dead On Delivery, Go Easy Dear Old Dads Geriatric Express Death Overcomes Driver's Generous Ego Drive Only During Great Emergencies

Happy B day Boss Boy!!!!! Bot added and approved this image

There is great need for a sarcasm font

I work for the Gov. and we bid out all of our Vehicles....Over the last 15 yrs I have driven them all....I have to tell ya,,,,The F150 by far has been the most reliable so far. We get rid of them at about 100K miles. That happens about every 2 yrs..Seems like the Mechanics are busy on everything but the Fords... Just yesterday at work I had to Pull out KW Loaded 5 Yard Truck with my GAS F250 Work Truck....Wish I would have gotten a Picture of that:skeptic: But I own a F250 PSD and Im on my 5th Turbo.... Its a Crap Shoot!!!!!!!!

Ok,,,,Back on Track....Gotta give you guys props.....I didnt think this thread would take off....LOL.... I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.

I tried to Google what he couldnt do and this is what I got... Google won't search for Chuck Norris because it knows you don't find Chuck Norris, he finds you. No standard web pages containing all your search terms were found. Your search - Chuck Norris - did not match any documents. Suggestions: Run, before he finds you Try a different person

If you can afford a large childs wagon and four cordless drills, you can afford and electric car!!! Remove wagon wheels Replace axles with large Screws Place screw heads into drill chucks Duct Tape drills to bottom of wagon so wheels are back in place turn on drills and drive!!!!!!!!

I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.

A group of country friends from the Cottonwood Baptist Church wanted to get together on a regular basis to socialize, and play games. The lady of the house was to prepare the meal. When it came time for Al and Janet to be the hosts, Janet wanted to outdo all the others. Janet decided to have mushroom-smothered steak, but, mushrooms are expensive. She then told her husband, 'No mushrooms. They are too high.' He said, 'Why don't you go down in the pasture and pick some of those mushrooms? There are plenty in the creek bed.' She said, 'No, some wild mushrooms are poison.' He said, 'Well, I see varmints eating them and they're OK.' So, Janet decided to give it a try. She picked a bunch, washed, sliced, and diced them for her smothered steak. Then she went out on the back porch and gave Ole' Spot (the yard dog) a double handful. Ole ' Spot ate every bite. All morning long, Janet watched Ole' Spot and the wild mushrooms didn't seem to affect him, so she decided to use them. The meal was a great success, and Janet even hired a helper lady from town to help her serve. She had on a white apron and a fancy little cap on her head. After everyone had finished, they relaxed, socialized, and played Phase 10 and Mexican train dominoes. About then, the helper lady from town, came in and whispered in Janet's ear, 'Mrs. Williams, Ole' Spot just died'. Janet went into hysterics. After she finally calmed down, she called the doctor and told him what had happened. The doctor said, 'That's bad, but I think we can take care of it. I will call for an ambulance and I will be there as quick as possible. We'll give everyone enemas and we will pump out everyone's stomach. Everything will be fine. Just keep them calm.' Soon they could hear the siren as the ambulance was coming down the road. The EMT's and the doctor had their suitcases, syringes, and a stomach pump. One by one, they took each person into the bathroom, gave them an enema, and pumped out their stomach. After the last one was finished, the doctor came out and said, 'I think everything will be fine now.' Then he left. They were all l looking pretty weak sitting around the living room, and about this time, the helper lady came in and said, 'You know, that fellow that ran over Ole' Spot never even stopped.'

Very nice,,,,,I miss my old Hemi......

Depends on a few things to I guess.....How big a Hauler we can get in there and how many of my Fellow Wizards want to join me....Gotta Make it Cost Effective.....

What does the Camping Cost?????

WOMAN'S PERFECT BREAKFAST She's sitting at the table with her gourmet coffee. Her son is on the cover of the Wheaties box. Her daughter is on the cover of Business Week.. Her boyfriend is on the cover of Playgirl. And her husband is on the back of the milk carton. Keep reading-they get better!!! -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- WOMEN'S REVENGE 'Cash, check or charge?' I asked, after folding items the woman wished to purchase. As she fumbled for her wallet , I noticed a remote control for a television set in her purse. 'So, do you always carry your TV remote?' I asked. 'No,' she replied, 'but my husband refused to come shopping with me, And I figured this was the most evil thing I could do to him legally.' -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- UNDERSTANDING WOMEN (A MAN'S PERSPECTIVE) I know I'm not going to understand women. I'll never understand how you can take boiling hot wax, Pour it onto your upper thigh, rip the hair out by the root, And still be afraid of a spider. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- MARRIAGE SEMINAR While attending a Marriage Seminar dealing with communication, Joe and his wife Ann listened to the instructor, 'It is essential that husbands and wives know each other's likes and dislikes..' He addressed the man, 'Can you name your wife's favorite flower?' Tom leaned over, touched his wife's arm gently and whispered, 'It's Pillsbury, isn't it? -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- CIGARETTES AND TAMPONS A man walks into a pharmacy and wanders up & down the aisles.. The sales girl notices him and asks him if she can help him. He answers that he is looking for a box of tampons for his wife... She directs him down the correct aisle. A few minutes later, he deposits a huge bag of cotton balls and a ball of string on the counter. She says, confused, 'Sir, I thought you were looking for some tampons for your wife? He answers, 'You see, it's like this, yesterday, I sent my wife to the store To get me a carton of cigarettes, and she came back with a tin of tobacco And some rolling papers; cause it's sooo-ooo--oo-ooo much cheaper. So, I figure if I have to roll my own . So does she. (I figure this guy is the one on the milk carton!) -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- WIFE VS. HUSBAND A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word. An earlier discussion had led to an argument and Neither of them wanted to concede their position. As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs, The husband asked sarcastically, 'Relatives of yours?' 'Yep,' the wife replied, 'in-laws.' -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- WORDS A husband read an article to his wife about how many words women use a day... 30,000 to a man's 15,000. The wife replied, 'The reason has to be because we have to repeat everything to men.. The husband then turned to his wife and asked, 'What?' -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- CREATION A man said to his wife one day, 'I don't know how you can be So stupid and so beautiful all at the same time. 'The wife responded, 'Allow me to explain. God made me beautiful so you would be attracted to me; God made me stupid so I would be attracted to you ! -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- WHO DOES WHAT A man and his wife were having an argument about who Should brew the coffee each morning. The wife said, 'You should do it because you get up first, And then we don't have to wait as long to get our coffee.. The husband said, 'You are in charge of cooking around here and You should do it, because that is your job, and I can just wait for my coffee.' Wife replies, 'No, you should do it, and besides, it is in the Bible that the man should do the coffee.' Husband replies, 'I can't believe that, show me.' So she fetched the Bible, and opened the New Testament and showed him at the top of several pages, that it indeed says 'HEBREWS' -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- The Silent Treatment A man and his wife were having some problems at home And were giving each other the silent treatment. Suddenly, the man realized that the next day, he would need his wife to wake him At 5:00 AM for an early morning business flight. Not wanting to be the first to break the silence (and LOSE), he wrote on a piece of paper, 'Please wake me at 5:00 AM.' He left it where he knew she would find it. The next morning, the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 AM and he had missed his flight. Furious, he was about to go and see why his wife hadn't wakened him, when he noticed a piece of paper by the bed. The paper said, 'It is 5:00 AM. Wake up.' Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- God may have created man before woman, but there is always a rough draft before the masterpiece

Cant wait for the Snow Trip at the end of Jan. http://www.sandwizards.com/diamondlake2008.htm

I, __John______Doe_________ being of sound mind and body, do not wish to be kept alive indefinitely by artificial means. Under no circumstances should my fate be put in the hands of pinhead partisan politicians who couldn't pass ninth-grade biology if their lives depended on it or lawyers/doctors/hospitals interested in simply running up the bills. If a reasonable amount of time passes and I fail to ask for at least one of the following: ______a Martini ______a Margarita ______ a Scotch & soda ______a Bloody Mary ______a Gin and Tonic _______a Glass of Chardonnay ______a Beer_______a Steak ______Lobster or crab legs ______the remote control ______a bowl of ice cream ______the sports page ______Chocolate or ______Sex It should be presumed that I won't ever get any better. When such a determination is reached, I hereby instruct my appointed person and attending physicians to pull the plug, reel in the tubes and call it a day. At this point, it is time to call the New Orleans Jazz Funeral Band to come do their thing at my funeral, and ask all of my friends to raise their glasses to toast all the good times we have had. Signature: ___________________________ Date: _____________________ NOTE: I also hear that in Ireland they have a Nursing Home with a Pub. The patients are happier and they have a lot more visitors. Some of them don't even need embalming when their time comes. If anyone knows the name of this happy place PLEASE pass it on!

This is in Florence Or. Trike Fest 07....Not the Best Video....I didnt bring the Helmet cam on this trip....So Had to Shoot what I could of people playing around....The Trike in the water is the White and Red 250R running around...He dried it out and it ran like a top.... Dont shoot the Camera Man!!!!! Trike Fest Rampage 07

Talking SHYT While Im offline huh!!! LMAO.... Hey,,,I didnt see anything about the Camping on the Desert Vipers Site....Any insight on that????