mywifeknowseverythin

No one wanted to room with Bob, because he snored so badly.They decided it wasn't fair to make one of them stay with him the whole time, so they voted to take turns. Admin slept with Bob and comes to breakfast the next morning with his hair a mess and his eyes all bloodshot.They said, "Man, what happened to you?"He said, "Bob snored so loudly, I just sat up and watched him all night." The next night it was a different Stoopidbot1's turn. In the morning, same thing--hair all standing up, eyes all bloodshot.They said, "Man, what happened to you? You look awful!" He said, 'Man, that Bob shakes the roof with his snoring. I watched him all night." The third night was BuckBilly's turn. Buckbilly was a tanned, older cowboy; a man's man. The next morning he came to breakfast bright-eyed and bushy-tailed. "Good morning!" he said. They couldn't believe it. They said, "Man, what happened?" He said, "Well, we got ready for bed. I went and tucked Bob into bed, patted him on the butt, and kissed him good night.. Bob sat up and watched me all night."

The Best Smart As* Answers of 2008 !!? SMART AS* ANSWER #6 It was mealtime during an airline flight. 'Would you like dinner?' the flight attendant asked John, seated in front. ?'What are my choices?' John asked. 'Yes or no,' she replied. SMART AS* ANSWER #5 A flight attendant was stationed at the departure gate to check tickets. As a man approached, she extended her hand for the ticket and he opened his trench coat and flashed her. Without missing a beat, she said, 'Sir, I need to see your ticket, not your stub.' SMART AS* ANSWER #4 A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery store but she couldn't find one big enough for her family. She asked a stock boy, ' Do these turkeys get any bigger?' The stock boy replied, 'No ma'am, they're dead.' SMART AS* ANSWER #3 The police officer got out of his car as the kid who was stopped for speeding rolled down his window. 'I've been waiting for you all day,' the officer said. The kid replied, Yeah, well I got here as fast as I could.' When the cop finally stopped laughing, he sent the kid on his way without a ticket. SMART AS* ANSWER #2 A truck driver was driving along on the freeway and noticed a sign that read: Low Bridge Ahead. Before he knows it, the bridge is right in front of him and hi s truck gets wedged under it. Cars are backed up for miles. Finally a police car comes up. The cop gets out of his car and walks to the truck driver, puts his hands on his hips and says, 'Got stuck, huh?' The truck driver says, 'No, I was delivering this bridge and I ran out of gas.' SMART AS* ANSWER OF THE YEAR 2008! A college teacher reminds her class of tomorrow's final exam. 'Now class, I won't tolerate any excuses for you not being here tomorrow. I might consider a nuclear attack or a serious personal injury, illness, or a death in your immediate family, but that's it, no other excuses whatsoever!' A smart-as* student in the back of the room raised his hand and asked, 'What would you say if tomorrow I said I was suffering from complete and utter sexual exhaustion?' The entire class is reduced to laughter and snickering. When silence was restored, the teacher smiled knowingly at the student, shook her head and sweetly said, 'Well, I guess you'd have to write the exam with your other hand.' A BONUS EXTRA A woman is standing nude looking in the bedroom mirror. She is not happy with what she sees and says to her husband, 'I feel horrible; I look old, fat and ugly. I really need you to pay me a compliment.' The husband replies, 'Your eyesight's damn near perfect.?

Ok So,,,,,I got to ride the Thing for a Few hours on Sat. with Shasta Mike and Dirtdog......I think Im liking it....Has Power Everywhere Its just too bad my first Experience with it was on the Dirt and Rocks and Mud and Creek Crossing....Did I mention Dirt and Mud??? Freakin Red Clay Leaves a lasting mark :evil: The Suspension is Very Comfy Elec. Start, Fuel Inj. is nice as well.....Im sure it will take a while to get used to and Comfortable.... Overall.....Im Happy 8-) Bot.......One of these Days I will make it out there.....Is there Sand somewhere????

[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UrLvYrKYVD8]YouTube - 1950s Italian Police Motorcycle Drill Team[/ame]

Two guys were discussing popular family trends on sex, marriage, and family values. Stu said, 'I didn't sleep with my wife before we got married, did you?' Leroy replied, 'I'm not sure, what was her maiden name?' --------------------------------------------------------- A little boy went up to his father and asked: 'Dad, where did my intelligence come from?' The father replied. 'Well, son, you must have got it from your mother, cause I still have mine.' --------------------------------------------------------- 'Mr. Clark, I have reviewed this case very carefully,' the divorce Court Judge said, 'And I've decided to give your wife $775 a week,' 'That's very fair, your honor,' the husband said. 'And every now and then I'll try to send her a few bucks myself.' --------------------------------------------------------- A doctor examining a woman who had been rushed to the Emergency Room, took the husband aside, and said, 'I don't like the looks of your wife at all.' 'Me neither doc,' said the husband. 'But she's a great cook and really good with the kids.' ----------------------------------------------------------- An old man goes to the Wizard to ask him if he can remove a curse he has been living with for the last 40 years. The Wizard says, 'Maybe, but you will have to tell me the exact words that were used to put the curse on you.' The old man says without hesitation, 'I now pronounce you man and wife.' ---------------------------------------------------------- Two Reasons Why It's So Hard To Solve A Redneck Murder: 1. The DNA all matches. 2. There are no dental records. ---------------------------------------------------------- A blonde calls Delta Airlines and asks, 'Can you tell me how long it'll take to fly from San Francisco to New York City ?' The agent replies, 'Just a minute.' 'Thank you,' the blonde says, and hangs up. ---------------------------------------------------------- Two Mexican detectives were investigating the murder of Juan Gonzalez. 'How was he killed?' asked one detective. 'With a golf gun,' the other detective replied. 'A golf gun! What is a golf gun?' 'I don't know. But it sure made a hole in Juan.' ----------------------------------------------------------- Moe: 'My wife got me to believe in religion.' Joe: 'Really?' Moe: 'Yeah. Until I married her I didn't believe in Hell.' ---------------------------------------------------------- A man is recovering from surgery when the Surgical Nurse appears and asks him how he is feeling. 'I'm O. K. but I didn't like the four letter-words the doctor used in surgery,' he answered.. 'What did he say,' asked the nurse. 'Oops!' ------------------------------------------------------------ While shopping for vacation clothes, my husband and I passed a display of bathing suits. It had been at least ten years and twenty pounds since I had even considered buying a bathing suit, so sought my husband's advice. 'What do you think?' I asked. 'Should I get a bikini or an all-in-one?' 'Better get a bikini,' he replied. 'You'd never get it all in one.' He's still in intensive care. ............................................................................. The graveside service just barely finished, when there was massive clap of thunder, followed by a tremendous bolt of lightning, accompanied by even more thunder rumbling in the distance. The little old man looked at the pastor and calmly said, 'Well, she's there.'

[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tZCVmBcLUQQ]YouTube - Antique's Roadshow for Men[/ame]

Actual call center conversations! Customer: 'I've been calling 700-1000 for two days and can't get through; Can you help?' Operator: 'Where did you get that number, sir?' Customer: 'It's on the door of your business.' Operator: ' Sir, those are the hours that we are open.' +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ Samsung Electronics Caller: 'Can you give me the telephone number for Jack?' Operator: 'I'm sorry, sir, I don't understand who you are talking about.' Caller: 'On page 1, section 5, of the user guide it clearly states that I Need to unplug the fax machine from the AC wall socket and Telephone Jack before cleaning. Now, can you give me the Number for Jack?' Operator: 'I think it means the telephone plug on the wall.' ---------------------------------------------------------------------- RAC Motoring Services Caller: 'Does your European Breakdown Policy cover me when I am Traveling in Australia ?' Operator: 'Does the product name give you a clue?' --------------------------------------------- ------------------------- Caller (enquiring about legal requirements while traveling in Europe ) 'If I register my car in France , and then take it to England , do I have to change the steering wheel to the other side of the car?' ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Directory Enquiries Caller: 'I'd like the number of the Argo Fish Bar, please' Operator: 'I'm sorry, there's no listing. Are you sure that the spelling is correct?' Caller: 'Well, it used to be called the Bargo Fish Bar but the 'B' fell off.' ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Then there was the caller who asked for a knitwear company in Woven. Operator: 'Woven? Are you sure?' Caller: 'Yes. That's what it says on the label -- Woven in Scotland ' ---------------------------------------------------------------------- On another occasion, a man making heavy breathing sounds from a phone box told a worried operator: 'I haven't got a pen, so I'm steaming up the window to write the number on.' ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Tech Support: 'I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop.' Customer: 'OK.' Tech Support: 'Did you get a pop-up menu?' Customer: 'No.' Tech Support: 'OK . Right-Click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?' Customer: 'No.' Tech Support: 'OK, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up until this Point?' Customer: 'Sure. You told me to write 'click' and I wrote 'click'.' ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Tech Support: 'OK. At the bottom left hand side of your screen, can You see the 'OK' button displayed?' Customer: 'Wow! How can you see my screen from there?' ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Caller: 'I deleted a file from my PC last week and I just realized that I need it. So, if I turn my system clock back two weeks will I get my file back again?' ---------------------------------------------------------------------- This has to be one of the funniest things in a long time. I think this guy should have been promoted, not fired. This is a true story from the WordPerfect Helpline, which was transcribed from a recording monitoring the customer care department. Needless to say the Help Desk employee was fired; however, he/she is currently suing the WordPerfect organization for 'Termination without Cause.' Actual dialogue of a former WordPerfect Customer Support employee. (Now I know why they record these conversations!): Operator: 'Ridge Hall, computer assistance; may I help you?' Caller: 'Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect.' Operator: 'What sort of trouble??' Caller: 'Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words Went away.' Operator: 'Went away?' Caller: 'They disappeared' Operator: 'Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?' Caller: 'Nothing.' Operator: 'Nothing??' Caller: 'It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type.' Operator: 'Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?' Caller: 'How do I tell?' Operator: 'Can you see the 'C: prompt' on the screen?' Caller: 'What's a sea-prompt?' Operator: 'Never mind, can you move your cursor around the screen?' Caller: 'There isn't any cursor; I told you, it won't accept anything I Type.' Operator: 'Does your monitor have a power indicator??' Caller: 'What's a monitor?' Operator: 'It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on?' Caller: 'I don't know.' Operator: 'Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord goes into it.. Can you see that??' Caller: 'Yes, I think so.' Operator: 'Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the wall. Caller: 'Yes, it is.' Operator: 'When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one? ' Caller: 'No.' Operator: 'Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other cable..' Caller: 'Okay, here it is.' Operator: 'Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of your computer.' Caller: 'I can't reach.' Operator: 'OK. Well, can you see if it is?' Caller: 'No.' Operator: 'Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over?' Caller: 'Well, it's not because I don't have the right angle -- it's because it's dark.' Operator: 'Dark?' Caller: 'Yes - the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window.' Operator: 'Well, turn on the office light then.' Caller: 'I can't.' Operator: 'No? Why not?' Caller: 'Because there's a power failure.' Operator: 'A power ... A power failure? Aha.. Okay, we've got it licked now. Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff that your computer came in?' Caller: 'Well, yes, I keep them in the closet.' Operator: 'Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was when you got it.. Then take it back to the store you bought it from.' Caller: 'Really? Is it that bad?' Operator: 'Yes, I'm afraid it is.' Caller: 'Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them?' Operator: 'Tell them you're too stupid to own a computer!

That kinda Sounds like a Personals Add:laugh:

Done:wink:

HA HA!!!!!!!!!! I was wondering if someone was gonna start something like this:laugh: I did this a few yrs ago for Garretts Quad....He LOVES Stickers.....

[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N3vCy36KEZg&feature=player_embedded]YouTube - JWalking[/ame]

Negative.....Never been on a Quad other than my Wifes Wolverine....And that was just to go to the Bathroom and Cruise around Camp.... I have never had the Desire to ride one....I can still go pretty much anywhere a Quad can where I ride....But....For some strange reason...I woke up and felt I needed something Different... Anyway,,,,I guess this is what it looks like.....I havent seen it yet:huh:

And before that.....6 or so yrs ago......My Buddie and I did a 1 yr. run on Trails.....

I take that back.....I just found some pictures of a little Ride I did in my Back yard on the River..... Maybe 2 yrs ago.....

SAND ALL THE WAY!!!!!!! The Scenery is there along with the Ocean!!!!! I will however be Riding in the Mud/dirt This weekend for the first time in 6 or so yrs....LOL!!! If it doesnt rain too much Ill get some pics of that for ya....

Its the Remote Resi Hose..... You can send it in to have Rebuilt......Other than that and buying a used shock off ebay I think your out of luck.... I think your Cheapest route is to buy one off ebay.... eBay Motors: 1981 1982 HONDA ATC 250R 250 R SHOCK & RESEVOIR (item 220379992726 end time Mar-22-09 21:05:04 PDT)

I still have a Yamaha 2 Stroke.....

Well,,,,,,,After 35 yrs of Riding on 3 Wheels....... I broke down today and bought a new 08 Raptor 700R......I havent seen it yet, or sat on one but it will be in the Garage next Friday....I stood in my Garage today for Hours just Talkin to my Trikes and trying to find the Best way to break the news..Went through a whole pack of Smokes before I could tell them..They just looked So disgusted with me....I really couldnt even look at them directly:frown: WTF did I just do!!!

Here you go.......If this doesnt clear it up PM me and I will help you through it or Post them for you:wink: http://www.quadcrazy.com/atvforum/learning-center/2796-how-insert-image-into-post.html

Did you two loose your Man Cards??????

Alright......The people have Voted!!!!!!!!! Get it Boss Boy!!!!!!!!

Dude!!!!!!!! Best Wishes and Safe Return..... From one Operator to another........ Glass Down and Blade up Brotha....

There is a Thread Revival Epidemic going on today:laugh: I moved this thread into the new forum.....Hopefully it gets more hits in here....